Following support from thousands of Australians, and bipartisan support signals from the Opposition, the Government says the best way to solve the gendered violence crisis is with an extra $50 billion in defence spending.
“Our country is facing a crisis that we can’t keep steadily ignoring for another 30 years. And that’s the dramatic underfunding of our defence sector,” Prime Minister Anthony Albanese said at a press conference that he previously declined to speak at.
“This is an emotional time for our country and when I’m emotional, I think about what really matters, from my mum growing up in public housing, to the capabilities of Virginia class nuclear submersible vessels,” he said wiping tears from his eyes.
“I know we have a domestic violence crisis too. Which is why I promise that no woman in Australia will have to feel threatened by anything, provided we can deploy an MQ9 reaper drone as a countermeasure.
“Thirty-two women have died already this year at the hands of gendered and domestic violence. To honour them we will be naming each and every new naval vessel after them, as well as adding an additional $32 billion over the forward estimates. That should keep everyone safe!”
The announcement has received bipartisan support, with Opposition leader Peter Dutton adding that if any woman feels unsafe, they should phone his office and ‘Press 2 if your assailant was part of an African gang’.
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By Shane Murphy (Shane is donating his writer’s fee to What Were You Wearing)
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By Shane Murphy