Scissors Needed to Open Scissors — The Shovel

Scissors Needed to Open Scissors

A man who bought a pair of scissors because he doesn’t have any scissors, has arrived home to find that he can only open the scissors with an existing pair of scissors.

Confused about what to do, thirty-eight-year-old Jordan Clayborn returned to the shop to buy another pair of scissors to open the original pair of scissors, only to find that the new pair of scissors could also only be opened with another pair of scissors.

After unsuccessfully trying to open the scissors with a knife and his teeth, Mr Clayborn returned the scissors to the store, asking the shop assistant how he was supposed to unpackage the scissors, to which the shop assistant replied, “you’ll need a pair of scissors to open that”.

Asked why the scissors would be packaged in a way that they can only be accessed using another pair of scissors, the shop assistant said that it would be dangerous to have an open pair of scissors. “That’s why we package them with zip ties that can only be accessed with an open pair of scissors”.

Mr Clayborn asked if the shop had a pair of scissors he could borrow to open the scissors, to which the shop assistant replied, “Of course,” handing him a pair of scissors locked with zip ties. Asking if he could have a pair that was open, the assistant replied, “that would be dangerous”.

Mr Clayborn returned home and eventually opened the scissors with a chainsaw.

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