Local News

834,000 Words Removed from Shakespeare’s Plays, After Students Say They Find the Whole Fucking Thing Offensive

Millionaires Form Yacht Blockade in Sydney Harbour to Protest Superannuation Changes

’15 Minute’ Conspiracy Theorist Does Extra Lap of Block After Accidentally Arriving at Work in Under 15 Minutes

Generation Raised on Harry Potter Starting to Think Room Under the Stairs Actually Not a Bad Setup

Couple mix things up by going out to restaurant to scroll through phones

Local Comedian Surprises Wife for Valentine’s Day With Huge Bunch of Flours

Local woman’s photos mainly just screenshots of home screen

Dad Tells Awestruck Children Story of How He Survived Entire School Day Without 2 Litre Water Bottle

Man struggles at making conversation without telling people he’s doing Dry January

Quick Shop Costs $480

British Woman Signs Up to Gym, Immediately Loses 50 Pounds

Woman’s New Year’s Resolution is to Get Less Distracted This

Man Resolves to be Fewer Pedantic About Grammar This Year

Man Complaining About Hot Cross Buns Yet To Realise He Doesn’t Have to Buy Them

Wise Men Thinking It’ll Be Easier to Give Jesus Combined Christmas/Birthday Present

Family reckon it’s time to tell Dad that Bandit Heeler isn’t real