The Australian Government has assured drivers they will no longer feel a pinch at the bowser, after a vast untapped deposit of oil was found inside a Domino’s Mega Meatlovers pizza.
In an announcement made outside Domino’s Enmore, Prime Minister Albanese declared the store would soon be opening as an oil refinery.
“With just what is produced at this one location, we will have enough oil to meet Australia’s fuel needs for a month,” the PM said, holding up a slice of deep-dish BBQ sausage and onion.
Concerns that the government had relied too much on the emergency stockpile also eased, when the oil reserve was entirely replenished by just half a Philly Cheesesteak pizza from Domino’s limited-time range.
A spokesperson from Domino’s shared that the company was thrilled to finally find an ethical use for their product.
However, critics accused the solution of being anti-competitive, and demanded the government seek an alternative energy source from somewhere like Pizza Hut, or even a Crust.
