In the wake of a major natural disaster occurring across the globe, President Trump has come to the rescue by imposing a 50% tariff on the foreign tsunami.
Meteorologists and seismologists alike have applauded Donald Trump for single-handedly fixing the damage the recent 8.8-magnitude earthquake did to the US economy.
“If the tsunami wants to come into our glorious country and do business, it’s going to need to pay up,” Trump threatened, before promising to boost local manufacturing.
“We’re going to build big, beautiful tsunamis right here in America, and they’re going to be huge, real huge. Way better than whatever Putin makes in Russia. 10ft, 20ft, 100ft tall tsunamis, those sort of numbers.”
Since learning of the imposed tariff, the tsunami’s trade negotiators have sought an exemption from the White House, due to the tsunami’s trade surplus with the US.
Negotiations ended abruptly, however, when Trump learned that the tsunami was in fact, a blue wave.
