A North Fitzroy woman has fallen into a state of shock after she found herself siding with Rupert Murdoch, over reports he is being sued by Donald Trump.
The woman, who has a ‘Fuck Murdoch’ sticker on her bike helmet and uses the Herald Sun as toilet paper, said she didn’t even know who she was anymore.
“When I learnt that Murdoch had published a note that Trump allegedly wrote to Jeffry Epstein, my first thought was ‘Go Rupert!’ and my second thought was ‘I need to check myself into hospital immediately’.
She said she had never felt like this before. “In the past, whenever the topic of ‘Which billionaire would you eat?’ came up, I was always very clear: ‘Rupert, with a side of Lachlan’.
“But now that he’s taking on Trump, I feel myself almost … liking the guy. I haven’t had an identity crisis like this since I sided with a man over Blake Lively”.
She said that with Donald Trump in power, it was important to support the press “And specifically in this case … the Murdoch-owned press,” she added, before proceeding to hyperventilate in the fetal position.
