Forcing someone to watch a replay of last night’s leaders debate between Anthony Albanese and Peter Dutton could be deemed a war crime, the United Nations has revealed.
A spokesperson for the UN warned that regimes such as Russia could use footage of the debate to bore prisoners to death.
“We have been made aware that footage is circulating of an Australian leaders’ debate characterised as ‘incredibly fucking tedious’ and ‘unbearably uninteresting’. It is likely to meet the UN’s torture definition, which is to ‘inflict severe pain or suffering’” the spokesperson said.
Experts worry that the footage is already being used to torment prisoners of war. “Having to listen to Peter Dutton talk about fuel excise is a cruel and unusual form of torture that could be used to coerce prisoners,” one expert said.
Asked to comment on the finding, both Anthony Albanese and Peter Dutton released statements which were too mind-numbing to re-print.
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Headline by Anthony Bell
