Canberra school student Ben Bailey will dress up as a seat 32D Qantas boarding pass this Halloween, in a costume he says will scare local politicians shitless.
“As soon as they see that the ticket is beyond row two, without a complimentary glass of Champagne, they will probably have a total mental breakdown,” Bailey explained. “The kicker will be when I tell them that there is no access to the Chairman’s Lounge. That’s terrifying for a federal politician in Australia”.
Prime Minister Anthony Albanese said he had never seen anything quite so terrifying, while Greens Leader Adam Bandt said he hoped he didn’t cross paths with the youngster.
In a rare show of bipartisan support, Opposition Leader Peter Dutton agreed, saying the costume went too far. “Dressing up as a vampire or the Grim Reaper is one thing. But exposing politicians to a ticket that doesn’t have extra leg-room or lounge access could cause heart attacks. I think this type of thing should be banned. The only thing scarier than that would be a Jetstar flight”.
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Headline by @sneezeblesser
