
Just days after American conservatives lost their minds over a brief section of the Olympic opening ceremony, French officials have told them that the Statue of Liberty, gifted to America in 1884, originally identified as a man.
“She transitioned on the trip over to New York,” a spokesperson confirmed. “Sorry we assumed you knew. I hope this doesn’t make you feel uncomfortable”.
France also confirmed that Lady Liberty had never been married and has no children. “She also owns a cat – if you look very closely, it’s right there by her feet. Our thoughts and prayers are with you at this difficult time”.
Senior Republicans have ordered the statue to be dismantled.
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Headline by Anthony Bell