Marvel fans are delighted, after the franchise confirmed Robert Downey Junior is locked in for the next 8,000 movies.
The star of jail and screen confirmed the rumours, saying he has an exclusive contract theorised to be worth billions. Disney insiders have revealed a new type of contract that leases exclusive rights to an actors’ career, body and soul for the next 8,000 productions dead or alive by tapping into the supernatural.
“Once we were able to make contact with Walt he was able to broker a merger with God acting as a trustee for Satan which means we can now control the lifespan of our actors, meaning we can continue to bring you you’re favourites for ever and ever,” a spokesperson said.
Downey Jnr said he is excited to return to the Marvel Cinematic Universe and hints that next century, Phase 18 through 20 will be ‘The most incredible adventures yet”.
“Praise be to Lord Uzul and his eternal darkness for being my new manager and for all the fans who just won’t accept when something is finished,” he said.
Disney says it will be rolling out new subscription packages which will cost no money but will invoke a 1,000 year servitude in the vicious bogs of the demon prince.
“Bless the Marvel cinematic universe and its endless bounties, and praise be to the mandatory viewing laws we intend to pass through congress if Trump gets in again” Downey Jnr added excitedly.
Negotiations with the ghost of Stan Lee are still underway.
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By Shane Murphy
