No Need to Spend Money on Sex Workers Because NDIS Recipients Already Get Fucked Every Day, Government Says — The Shovel

No Need to Spend Money on Sex Workers Because NDIS Recipients Already Get Fucked Every Day, Government Says

Bill Shorten has confirmed the Government will ban access to sex workers via the NDIS, saying it is ‘unnecessary’ when so much of the NDIS is designed to fuck recipient.

“It’s inadequately funded, overly complex and under-resourced, so I can assure you people are getting very fucked, very regularly. Shorten” said. “The fucking is built into the system, there’s no need to pay extra for this”.

‘Toys of a sexual nature’ will also be banned from funding after an inquiry found that taxpayers were already spending money on a bunch of dildos in Parliament House.

The NDIS still provides public funds for sex aid products like Viagra, but experts say this has become more of a giant throbbing metaphor for trying to use a system that only provides you with half of what you need to sustain a regular existence.

The Opposition has sent the planned reforms to a second Parliamentary inquiry, saying they’d be fine for NDIS recipients to use sex workers if they were willing to travel to the Parliament House Prayer Room.

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By Matt Harvey @mattharveystuff 

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