
Matildas captain Sam Kerr has been honoured for her unique contribution to Australian culture after she got shitfaced, chucked up in a cab, disputed the fare and then called an English cop a stupid white bastard.
“Nothing exemplifies the Australian spirit better than getting munted and then picking a fight with law enforcement. It’s what this country was built on,” a spokesperson for the Australian of the Year Awards said.
Commentators say Kerr’s stature has grown in the eyes of Australians. “I didn’t think it was possible for her to become more popular. But then she goes and does this. Let’s make her head of state,” one fan said.
Australians were initially worried when reports emerged that Kerr had ‘caused alarm and distress’ while using racial slurs. But fears subsided when details of the altercation emerged.
It is expected that the charges against Kerr will be dropped, after which English police will claim it as a moral victory.