Former Prime Minister John Howard says the 2003 cabinet documents that explain Australia’s justification for invading Iraq definitely exist, presenting a grainy black and white photograph and some fancy-looking diagrams to prove it.
“They definitely exist. I promise. You’ll never find them of course, but they are absolutely, 100%, categorically there. Trust me,” he told journalists today.
Asked how he knew the precise location of the missing documents, Howard said George Bush told him. “Just look at these grainy black and white photos of a non-descript area taken at an impossible-to-verify time, overlayed with some impressive-looking squares and arrows. How could you possibly deny that they are there?”
He recommended Australia launch a $40 billion ten-year effort to search for the documents. “You’ll never find them, but it will provide a nice distraction for the next decade,” he said.