Tens of billions of heavily armed United Nations troops have amassed off Australia’s north coast in readiness for a promised nation-wide takeover should the Voice referendum be successful on Saturday.
Although the polls suggest the Voice will not succeed, sources at the UN said they didn’t want to take any chances. “If the ‘Yes’ vote gets up, we won’t have any time to waste. Invading a 7.5 million square kilometre landmass, re-writing the land-deeds of eighteen million private properties and then enslaving an entire population can be logistically tricky”.
Asked why the UN would want to invade a country and take over its land, the source said, “Um … globalism? Elites? Jews? I can’t remember exactly, but there are some good YouTube videos about it that you should watch”.
Insiders rejected the idea that the invasion was, in fact, not real and that The Voice was merely an advisory body. “That’s only if you actually read the proposal for the Voice to Parliament. If you get your news from soap stars on 4 chan then it’s pretty clear that this is a full-scale takeover”.