Qantas has revealed a record profit of $2.5 billion after it convinced thousands of broke 22-year-olds that it’s totally normal to drop $8k on a one-way fare for a spontaneous trip home.
“We’ve never made so much cash,” a Qantas spokesperson said. “All you need is a poignant family reunion story, an emotional soundtrack, and a 5-second grab of some uni student tucking in for the night in his Qantas pyjamas, and suddenly everyone thinks it’s standard procedure to fly business class for an 8-hour flight from Tokyo”.
He said the famous Qantas ‘Feels like home’ commercials worked because they tugged at certain human emotions. “Guilt, specifically. We’ve had kids taking out bank loans to get a $12k business seat from Heathrow because their Mum sent them a link to the ad saying ‘maybe you could do this?’ Some of them don’t even have HECS debts that big. Actually they all do, bad example, but you know what I mean”.