Saying he wanted to make a bold statement and distinguish his government from the Coalition, Anthony Albanese today announced that his party will not accept any fossil fuel donations between 8:30pm and 9:30pm on Saturday 23rd March.
“For an entire part of Saturday evening – an hour where most of us would be enjoying after-dinner drinks with our favourite lobbyists – we’re drawing a clear line in the sand,” the PM said.
“Like all lines in the sand these days, it will be rapidly washed away. But to Woodside, Santos, Chevron and our other supporters whose core business will destroy our way of life within fifty years…we say ‘enough!’. Keep that filthy 0.01% of your donations to yourselves tomorrow night”.
Facing pressure to deliver on its emissions reductions commitments, Albanese said that refusing to receive donations between dinner and dessert from companies that remain deeply invested in extracting and burning fossil fuels, despite clear scientific advice on the disastrous impacts of doing so, showed Labor’s commitment to rein in the industry.
“The fossil fuel industry gave us $1.4 million – that you know about – last year. There are 8,760 hours in a year and so we’re giving up $136.90 as part of this Earth Hour initiative.
“That’s a tremendous sacrifice, and it’s going to hurt. We’ll need to find another way to pay for a round of drinks tomorrow night. We’ll probably hit up a nuclear submarine contractor. That’s the type of adaptive thinking that needs to become normal if we’re going to make a genuine difference”.
Albanese said he was prepared to do everything it takes to ensure a safe climate. “If the big polluters fail to act, I will not hesitate to increase this pause to an hour and a half in 2024”.
By Tim Hall