I Went Without My Phone For a Week And, Oh Fuck This is Such a Boring Article — The Shovel

I Went Without My Phone For a Week And, Oh Fuck This is Such a Boring Article

Have you ever stopped and wondered what it would be like if I had to live without my phone for a week? Nah, me neither. Problem is, we’ve got content targets to hit here, and the fact that you may not find my life without a phone fascinating is really neither here nor there.

According to a recent study, oh Jesus Christ this is tedious. According to a recent study we spend more than four hours a day looking at articles about people who decide to go without their phones for a week for the purpose of filling column space.

Children as young as two are now writing their own articles about their phone-free experiences, and psychologists are concerned that absolutely no one finds it interesting.

Here’s what I learnt:

  1. I had more conversations. Not with other people. They were all on their phones. But in my head I created some new personas to converse with.

 

  1. I sung more. Although that could be because I took up singing lessons last week.

 

  1. I looked around at the world more. And spent more time creepily staring at people on the train.

 

  1. I couldn’t text my friends. So I just hung out a home like a loser.

 

  1. I didn’t have an alarm clock anymore. So I accidentally slept through the first 3 days of the experiment.

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